The Apprentice

DIY in the Bird family, as a rule does not come naturally. I remember my Gramps decorating more than one room for us when were kids, if not it was his friend 'Simo'. Dad's philosophy was always to get somebody in, whilst my Mum would always go ahead and do it anyway as it was always too expensive to get someone in professionally.

When we painted the flat it was always a simple affair as the walls were brand new and so along with the ceilings and woodwork required no attention. All was required was for either Stephanie or I to paint! Painting is fairly simple as far as DIY goes, and we didn't come across too many problems.

I did attempt to put up some shelving prior to Oliver's room becoming the nursery and as a result drilled into possibly the only place in the whole flat that was undrillable due to some kryptonite, or equally Impenetrable material being placed behind the plasterboard.

Decorating the new house therefore is a somewhat higher level of DIY to my very limited comfort zone.

Our two projects we have set ourselves to complete prior to us moving in is to redecorate the new nursery and to recolour two walls in mine and Stephanie's new room.

The new house is actually far from new and is probably over 70 years old, so the nursery has had it's fair share of wear and tear. In my memory I can remember what the room looked like when we moved in, then when Gramps decorated it turning it into a pink palace for my sister, then again 10 years later into something fit for a stroppy teenager. Since Jessica moved out it became home to Craig, but pretty much remained the same the whole time he was there.

There are things I can do, and can do fairly efficiently, removing wallpaper is one! Taking down lightshades and curtain poles is the other! But once you have the bare shell of the room, making it look like a creation from Property Ladder or DIY SOS is not quite so simple.

Luckily I have been fed lots of advice from lots of different people, mainly from the two Wenham men whom have been around helping me whilst feeding me more information and tips than Handy Andy and Sarah Beeney combined.

Tips and information is great and massively appreciated, but when you have a fatally flawed DIY genetic disorder putting it into practice is another matter.

Last weekend I had a practical demonstration in the arts of: filling holes in walls, removing radiators, sanding woodwork, relocating the position of light fittings in ceilings, filling up holes in ceilings where light used to be, undercoating, preparing woodwork for glossing and a whole manner of other things!

I like to try and do the things that I have been shown, and have had two patient teachers who are happy to share the their tips! Although I do get frustrated when it doesn't quite look right or keeps going wrong. I don't like having to get people to do things for me as I feel guilty standing around watching, but as I was told over the weekend you only learn by trying!

Still, I have the smallest room of the house in which to practice and hone my new found skills before Stephanie allows me to be unleashed on the rest of the house!

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